Awakening the Giants Within: Roz Clark's Odyssey from Dream Doula to Beacon of Authenticity

Have you ever met someone whose life seemed to be a beacon, guiding others to their true north? Meet Roz Clark, our vibrant guest and dream doula, who has dedicated herself to awakening the sleeping giants within women, helping them birth their dreams into reality. Roz's journey is an odyssey from singing in the streets of Paris on her 21st birthday, through the valleys of motherhood with a special needs child, to rising as a champion for authenticity. Her story isn't just about personal triumph; it's a masterclass on transcending the ordinary, a life painted with the bold strokes of passion and purpose.

Our conversation with Roz takes us through the delicate terrain of human relationships, unraveling the often invisible threads that bind us to the role of rescuer. From vivid childhood memories of sheltering a disadvantaged friend to navigating a stormy marriage, Roz's reflections serve as a mirror for many of us. But it's the metamorphosis from protector to empowered guide that truly defines her tale. As Roz opens up about transforming her life's greatest challenges into a beacon for others, you might just find the keys to unlock your own patterns and step into a life of service that uplifts rather than burdens.

The crescendo of our time with Roz is a heart-to-heart on the essence of personal freedom and inner peace. How often do we wear the mask of success, chasing external validations at the cost of our true selves? Roz's candid recount of her own epiphanies in this realm acts as a gentle yet firm invitation to embrace the stillness, listen to our inner wisdom, and honor our greatest potential. Join us as we explore these profound insights, and you may discover that the greatest journey you'll ever embark on is the one that leads you back to your authentic self.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:21

Nothing is permanent except our souls. That is why we need to come together, traveling through one another's countries, creating a bridge, removing all the labels and just coming together as one people, finding our home in one world, and that is why our signature talk today is so important. Today I have the guest honor of welcoming Roz Clark to the show. Roz, thank you so much for being on the show today. Thank you for having me. I'm excited If you could just give a little bit of introduction to the world of who you are.

Speaker 2: 1:08

Who I am Once upon a time. That's usually how I start out, because I'm a dream dula. That's really the work that I do. I help people, especially women, women who feel trapped in the lives that they've created. I help them to give birth to their dreams. I help them to show up fully and authentically as their selves and create the impact in the world that they really want to do. So that is my heart's passion, that is my calling. I would say that from the time I was a child, I knew I was an artist, because I believe that we were created by a divine creator to be creative. So I started out in arts and entertainment and through just a series of amazing experiences Some were 50 shades of crazy, and yet they brought me to the path and to the place where I'm able to help, support people to move into their gifts and into their greatness.

Speaker 1: 2:05

I love that so much. The whole concept of bringing people's dreams alive is something that I feel like is so fractured for a lot of people, because they seem to suppress who their authentic truth self is and not allow those dreams to really surface and come to life. So I think this is really beautiful work, and I would love to know where did this come from? Like, did this start when you were a little girl? How did this happen?

Speaker 2: 2:38

So, absolutely, I was always a dreamer. I grew up in a blue collar working class neighborhood in Pittsburgh, pennsylvania. I came of age through like well, I was a young child in the 60s, came of age in the 70s, into the 80s, and so, while where I was from especially being a woman of color was not necessarily like the dreams that I had were so much bigger than where I was from, I always saw myself on stages. I always saw lights on me. I always was like, oh, I can do this. And it started with something as simple as my mom taking us to the ice capades every year, and there was lights and music and skating and all of that. I was like, oh my gosh, I want to do that. I can't skate, but I can sing, so let me just do that. And so I've always had this inherent joy. You know, I'm just this energetic, joyful person, and so it doesn't mean that life is always perfect. And yet I realized that life is always perfecting me, and so I just dared to dream. And so I turned 21 in Paris, you know, which is like unheard of being from where I'm from, and I was singing with a classical choir at the time, and so I was on track to have an international career as a classical soprano and when I came back to the States I got married.

Speaker 2: 4:03

I was still working on my craft. I got married and my second child, my son, was born with special needs, and that changed my trajectory. And so I began to help other people make their dreams come true, because I had made the choice to be an advocate for my son and create as much normalcy as I could in a crazy situation for my daughter. So, yeah, I've been this girl since I was a little girl, like, oh, you can do it, come on, you know those movies. Come on, kids, let's have a show. So I've always been that, yes, we can do it, let's go for it, let's you know. Let's just be who we can be and you be who you want to be and like. So that's just been my joy and my passion and how I show up in the world.

Speaker 1: 4:50

And did you have any of this inspiration come from one of your family members or somebody who was an acquaintance Like? I feel like you were nudged as well, because for most children, you know it's more like sit down, be quiet. You know it's not go out there and you know be on a stage, a world stage nonetheless. So we're like who helped guide you into this? You?

Speaker 2: 5:20

know it. I can honestly say it was a divine calling. You know, like my, my family. Well, you know, when I was younger and was like I was in dance classes and the recitals were cute, you know, like they, they were okay with that, and yet the the magnitude of my dreams and my passion were very scary for them. You know, like I remember my dad saying to me one time honey, you're smart, you could have a real job. You know.

Speaker 2: 5:49

So being an artist was not necessarily an honorable profession. You know from where I came from, and so I think in some ways it was more tolerated like she's going to do it or she, that's who she is. And so I've just always had this internal drive and this internal fortitude. And so myself and my, my, my cousin were basically the only artistic people in my family. My cousin was actually the original firebird for dance theater of Harlem, so she was an amazing ballerina. And so, you know, I watched Arthur Mitchell. You know, take her around the world and put her in the national stages. But you know, by that time I was in my late teens, early 20s. So that whole arc from the time that I was a child was just sheer determination. Watching, you know, mgm musicals and although there was no one who looked like me in those movies, I still felt like there's something about that to call to the very core of who I was.

Speaker 1: 6:58

I love that so much because the fact that you were able to witness someone close to you have that opportunity, it really gave you the chance to look at your world and say you know what I can do this too. I can just totally own this and do this. And it's amazing, but you ended up turning 21 in Paris. How does that happen?

Speaker 2: 7:23

So it was super cool. I was singing in a classical choir. I was in college by then and so, like when I was coming up again, I thought, like I'm the quintessential African-American singer I grew up in the black church, you know, singing gospel music thought I was going to grow up and become either Patty LaBelle or Diana Ross and change gowns Every other song you know. And then every time I auditioned for programs. And when I was 13, I auditioned for a program called the Centers for the Musically Talented and they were like you're an opera singer. And I was like what? So I had no point of reference for that. I didn't know who Lien Ting Price was at the time. I didn't know who Mary and Anderson was at that time, and so I was still a bit resistant to it. And then, when I auditioned, every college that I auditioned for accepted me into their opera program and I was like, okay, god, I get it. So here we go. And so that's well, that part of it happened. And so I was touring. We toured all of France, which was the most amazing experience. And so that's how I came to turn 21 in Paris. And you know, like I said, I was like I can do this, I can have this international career, and I knew that I was gifted and I knew that I was talented, and that's one of the things I will say.

Speaker 2: 8:41

I had incredibly strong women in my life. My maternal grandmother was this four foot 11, just force of nature, and so there was nothing that she didn't find her way through. And so, while they may not have necessarily encouraged me to be an artist, they encouraged me to value who I was. I never felt less than, and so having that kind of core strength and from that feminine space was always really, really affirming for me. And you know, and I was at the same time, I was also an athlete, so I played, I played basketball, I was a power forward in high school and I tell people all the time, I'm the only soprano that you'll meet who can hit a high C and an outside jumper. And so I had this beautiful balance of masculine and feminine energy and I embraced all of that, and so that was like, if I thought of it, it's like let's go, let's go, let's do it.

Speaker 1: 9:46

It's a really incredible, inspiring story and the fact that you have this collection that is your life, these beautiful moments, it's just so inspiring because I think a lot of people just they don't allow themselves to grow like that because they have fear. So what did you do with this fear? Did it ever creep up for you?

Speaker 2: 10:13

Not really. And it's so funny because I get asked this question a lot and like so many people you know will have the, you know, like their breakthrough or their push through was from a place of fear or from a place of, you know, imposter syndrome or whatever that was. And like that was, none of that was my story, like my imagination was so big, you know, and so bold, so I didn't really have to push through that kind of fear and so any pushbacks that I got, you know, like, oh, you can't do this. Who do you think you are? People from where, who, where we're from, don't do that, whatever. That might have been the thing that I had to push back from, and fortunately for me it was never an internal battle. It was like and so and I think that part kind of strengthened me like, no, you don't get to tell me who I am. No, you don't get to. You know, you don't get to determine who I am. I get to do that.

Speaker 1: 11:14

Wow, and that, that piece of you, because you did touch on this just briefly earlier. There was this guidance, like this internal calling. Now, is that something that you connected with, like throughout your journey, or like I know there's this knowing right, but did you go further into that connection of knowing?

Speaker 2: 11:39

Oh yeah, absolutely Absolutely, because, like I said, you know, growing up in the church, you know you had. So that was the first kind of experience, exposure, whatever. And then, of course, being an artist, you're exposed to so many different people from so many different places and so many different you know, schools of thought and lifestyle and all of that, and so I've always been open to the dialogue and open to the conversation and even in that, like, growing up as a kid was like you know, I was always the friend to the underdog or the friend to the, you know, the weird kid or whatever, and so that was always a space that I felt comfortable in. So, because I was strong enough to show up as my fully and authentically as myself, you know I could hold space for somebody else that people may not have understood and appreciated. And what I know, you know, obviously in hindsight, in the journey, because, again, we're always being prepared and perfected in our journey, and now I'm the mom of an adult son with special needs. So, you know, I am the epitome of somebody who gets different, you know.

Speaker 2: 12:58

And so, while I never thought that that would be my journey, I never thought that that would be my experience. When it became that I, you know, I mean I'm not going to lie you know, initially it's like you're in that faith place oh God, fix him. Oh God, fix him, oh God, please fix him. And then what happened was God fixed me, and so I settled into what this journey is and was going to be, and so, in showing up as an advocate for him, you know, it allowed me to again just find that peace and that comfort and that clarity of knowing that all is well. And I mean, and that was a big, that was a big ask, because we were in and out of pediatric intensive care wards. He had his first seizure when he was eight months old and you have never seen anything so small, shake so hard.

Speaker 2: 13:57

And so even in that moment of saying, okay, I've got to stay centered, I've got to stay grounded, because you know you got medical people going all over the place and my, you know my husband, who was my husband at the time, you know he's nutting out and whatever.

Speaker 2: 14:17

And so I had to be that kind of centering, calming, clear, because I knew that if he went behind those doors him being my son, without me being there, they would overreact, they would overmedicate him. They would over whatever. And so, from that journey all the way through today, you know, I've always shown up as a team member in those situations so that I could make sure that it's like okay, this is what he does, this is what this looks like, and, of course, asking questions because I didn't know everything, and yet being calm and centered and clear enough to create a space that they allowed me you know, they allowed themselves to trust me. So it was like this is not going to be one of these screaming moms, she's not going to faint, she's not going to fall out. So let's become a team and work on his behalf.

Speaker 1: 15:17

Yeah, If I could go back to what you just said a moment ago, because I'm putting these pieces together you said that when you were younger, you always were the one that would be a friend to the underdog or to that type of person. What was it that drew you towards these people? I have no idea.

Speaker 2: 15:44

That's the honest and goodness truth. I mean just a heart, you know. I just I just had a heart for people. I never wanted to see anybody picked on or mistreated or you know whatever that was. And you know, in back in those days, you know kids, we fought, you know, and so I was. I was strong and I could fight and so, you know, so I could stand up to somebody and say, leave them alone, you know, leave that person alone.

Speaker 2: 16:11

I, like one kid and I won't call his full name, but his name was Gregory, and you know people, you know he came from a really rough situation and you could tell it, and even the teachers were unkind to him, you know, because he wasn't always clean and he was different and all of those things. And while I don't know his full situation, I always liked him and so when the other kids wanted to pick on him, it was like no, you don't get to do that, and if you want to pick on somebody, pick on me. And of course nobody wanted any parts of that, and so that was just something that was in me. I can't say like, oh, I just always wanted to be the champion of the underdog. It was just like that's how you show up, or that's how I showed up. That's all I can say.

Speaker 2: 16:58

There wasn't anything that I was tied or I felt like, oh, go, save them. It was just like who I was and how I showed up in the world. And what I will say, though, is those natural tendencies can sometimes become a detriment later on in life, because I, later on in life, kept showing up as a rescuer, and when you show up as a rescuer with people who are not honorable or who don't have the skill set to appreciate it, then you put yourself in harm's way, and so there's always that pendulum that may swing too far in the other direction, and so, again, looking in hindsight, that little girl who wanted to protect the underdog then became the woman who was in a toxic and dysfunctional relationship, always rescuing my partner and having to rescue my family and all of those pieces, and so, again, the things that are our gifts can also be our challenges.

Speaker 1: 18:11

It's so amazing that you connected that the way that you did, and there's so many listeners right now that can identify with what you're saying. For women especially, we are trained up to take care of other people and then for some, to your point, they take it an extra mile because they feel like this is part of the DNA of a woman. This is what we do. So I know you had said that part of what happened with your son also freed you, but I'm wondering, too, how much of this connectedness to the rescuing is part of what you needed freedom from.

Speaker 2: 18:59

Oh my god, totally, absolutely, which is like that's this part of my journey.

Speaker 2: 19:08

I stayed in that toxic and dysfunctional marriage for 30 years and then I walked away from it.

Speaker 2: 19:15

So, for 30 years of saying we can fix it therapy, prayer, whatever, eieio and, of course, yeah, having so when I put my career on the back burner to care for my son and then had to care.

Speaker 2: 19:34

So what I did was I cared for everybody and I didn't create a space for people to care for me, and so, yeah, it was definitely a journey and having to own some things and that's always what I'm about I'm going to own my part in it, and so my story is not that sad, like I gave up 30 years of my life, or I gave up the best years of my life no, actually the best years of my life for now, because I have so much information, I have so much clarity, I've overcome so much and I'm able to stand on my story instead of getting stuck in my story, and so that's part of the work that I do the women that I'm supporting is teaching them how to not be stuck in their story, but how to stand on their story, and so, when you take what you have and you take what you've experienced and then you can turn that around and, one, use it to help people and two, use it to free people.

Speaker 2: 20:42

Because I built a business, I built a brand, I built an identity around my ability to tell stories, around my ability to create things that didn't exist before and my ability to pull out the greatness in the people that are placed in my path, and so it's a better use of that skill set, because now I'm not trying to save everybody, I'm only serving the people who are my assignment now. That's the lesson that I learned.

Speaker 1: 21:17

Right, right. And what was the defining moment for you to release that old life?

Speaker 2: 21:27

So it's so funny. I'm actually working on a PDF right now. That's going to be something I, right now, probably just give it away. Ultimately, it'll probably be a sold product, and it's all around turning your content into cash, so taking your story and turning it into a business, and the piece in that though, to answer your question, one of the things that I just got done writing is nobody wakes up one day and decides, oh, I think I'll blow up my life today.

Speaker 2: 22:01

It doesn't happen like that.

Speaker 2: 22:02

It happens one disappointment at a time, one microaggression at a time, one volatile blow up at a time, and then it becomes this cumulative experience that you're like, ok, this is 50 shades of crazy, and if I stay in this, I'm not going to survive, and so I can't say that there was one major tipping point.

Speaker 2: 22:31

So part of our challenge was financial challenges, because this was somebody who wanted to live in places that we couldn't afford, and so this whole grandiose thing of putting stuff on for people who don't even really care about you, and so, at one point in time, we're living in a $1.2 million home and I come home from church and have to roll quarters to get food for dinner, because this person was more interested in living in a house that we couldn't afford, and had we lived within our means, we could have still lived a beautiful life.

Speaker 2: 23:15

So some people care about the outward appearance, and I've always been one that cared about the inward experience, and so finally, that was pretty much towards the end, like no, oh hell, no, I'm not going to keep doing this, like this is not who I am, this is not what my life is, and I'm clear and it was a long time coming, and yet I'm clear that they've made their choice and now I have to make mine, and so I chose me. So the fixer and the rescuer chose to fix life for herself and rescue herself, and that's been a beautiful thing.

Speaker 1: 23:59

That's amazing and that's something that I feel takes a long time for a lot of people to recognize that. And when they do recognize it, that cold hard truth of I have some decisions to make and they're not going to be comfortable, they're not going to be easy, and not everyone in my life is going to be OK with it. Yes, and that's OK. That's OK this time. That we're experiencing right now is people are becoming more and awareness of who they are and moving into that space of living authentically. I believe that there's just this higher vibrational soul energy that is occurring with people and the lower vibrational energy of other people that become toxic in these relationships. There isn't the tolerance. There was a point where people could tolerate it more.

Speaker 1: 25:03

If you look back generationally, we have a lot of examples of that, it's true, but I feel like now there is more intolerance of those kinds of examples because we have awareness, we have education, we have it's almost like there's this banning of women and people coming together and saying you don't have to live like this. This is not good for you, it's not good for your family, it's not good for your relations with all people. Right, because it does. It bleeds into your workplace, it bleeds into your friendships, it bleeds into acquaintances. So there's definitely more awareness. I believe, and I think too with that there's a flip side of it, because with the awareness, there's also this awareness that we have this incredible option of choice, right, the women and men and whoever are in relationships with each other, their partners. It's a choice. You don't have to be with that person anymore, like I think back to my grandparents and that generation. They would not have freely left one another. They would have stayed in those relationships despite whatever was going on behind closed doors.

Speaker 2: 26:36

Absolutely, and I can even say for sure for myself, because integrity is really important to me and because my word is really important to me. So that was one of the things that kept me there for a long, long time. Like I made a vow, I said that I was going to do this and I'm going to do this, and then, finally, what freed me from that was one just the very simplicity of you get to change your mind. You know, it's really that simple. So that was the simple part of it, like you get to change your mind. And the other part of it was you came into agreement with someone who didn't keep the agreement, so the agreement had been what was it I can't think of the word not revoked, but the agreement had been betrayed. You know what I mean? It wasn't, it was a one-sided agreement. And again, it's not from a place of a victim, because one of the things that I actually said to them was you get to be whoever you want to be, you get to choose whoever you want to be, and yet who you are is not someone I want to be with, and so when you get to the point that you can release people to the outcomes of their choices and not have any charge or energy attached to what that outcome looks like. That's when you're free. You know that's when you're free because the first thing we start comforting ourselves with is well, you know, carmen is a bitch, you know like Carmen's going to come and get them, and yet if you're still leaning into that, you're not free because you're attached to the outcome. Like I said, when you can get to the place and say your choice, go, go in peace. You know, while they may not actually do that, because to your point of what is happening energetically is that there is this, this higher vibration that is happening, and yet there is a darkness that is like, oh wait, a minute, we're losing, we're losing the battle, we're losing control, and so there's a a revving up of that. And so we who make the choice to vibrate and to experience and to show up at that space have got to make sure that we're not distracted or dissuade by what is going to come back at us, because it is going to come for a while, it will settle eventually. And yet it's like anything else If something starts changing, the first thing you're going to experience is resistance. So if resistance comes, don't be freaked out about it, just look at it and say, oh, I know what this is. This is resistance and this doesn't have anything to do with me. You know, protect yourself, yes, and yet don't own somebody else's experience, don't get sucked back in to that vortex of madness.

Speaker 2: 29:54

And that was, you know. That was a big part for me, because it was like what do you mean? You're not going to fix everything? What do you mean you're not going to take care of everything? And we were like one of those couples, you know, like, oh my gosh, they're amazing. And it's like, no, as a couple, we weren't amazing. We looked like we were amazing, you know. And what was amazing was probably that it lasted for 30 years, you know.

Speaker 2: 30:24

And yet it's interesting because, again, even in the midst of it, I never allowed myself to be the victim. And so, when I made the choice to leave, I made sure that I was clear on what my narrative was, what my story was. My story was you made this choice, you stayed. Then you made a better choice and you left, and that's the story, and there's no energy attached to any of them. It was the journey and the story. And so, again, in telling that story it's like and now I get to show up and serve, I get to show up and lead, I get to show up and speak into the lives of other women and say your voice matters, what you do matters, your feelings matter. No, you're not crazy and you can't, you don't get a do over from what happened. You just get to release that and walk into your gift and walk into your greatness. That's where it is and, like, that part of your story informs who you are in this moment.

Speaker 1: 31:39

Everything you said is so profound and so true, but I also know that there's also this period of mourning that happens with a relationship.

Speaker 1: 31:53

At some point, there is this awareness that it isn't healthy for your soul to continue down the path in this agreement and there is a mourning process that goes alongside of that.

Speaker 1: 32:09

There is a lot of grace that you give yourself with how you share your story and I think that is something a lot of women can learn from, because a lot of people not just women, but people get entangled in the details and they want to hang on to those details because then they feel validated, they feel that they have something there that gives them cause to take the next step, whatever that next step is, even when it's unpopular.

Speaker 1: 32:46

And it's not hard to rally the troops and get people to be in alignment in your army, I guess right when you have all these reasons. But to your point, that's not helping your soul to heal, it's not helping you to move forward. So for you guys, like as you were going through this experience, as you stated, you were with your husband for 30 years, so at some point there was this awareness and there was this mourning and there was this process that you went through to get to the point where there weren't these attachments right that you were clinging to? How did you release some of that, like what were some tools that you used to help you?

Speaker 2: 33:35

Yeah, and what I can say for me is I mourned my marriage while I was in it because I watched it die. So I was in it watching it die, you know what I mean. And I would say I stayed 15 years past the expiration date, and so that was the first piece of it and the first part of it for me. And so all the goodies prayer, meditation, movement, therapy all of those things, like every tool in the toolbox, and for me and here's the thing too, to your point, like, while I was going through this, because again I'm this joy and vibrancy and purpose person, that's who I am, those are my words, those are my qualities, those are all the things. And so, even in the anchoring in my faith and all of those things that I had, I was like I don't do stress. And da, da, da, da, da, da da. And my body grabbed hold of me and said, yes, we do.

Speaker 2: 34:45

And so I had created the dis-ease of an autoimmune disease, and so I say all the time that if it does not come out of your mouth, it will show up in your body. And so, while I thought I was okay and I thought that I was coping, what I understand was that anger and that rage and that disappointment and that hurt. My body had to work it out Now, fortunately, and I was in really bad shape when it hit, and it hit overnight, like my entire body just locked up and I was in the emergency room and even in that I literally almost crawled out. I was like I need you to take me to the emergency room and then I need you to leave. I did that part by myself and as my body, you know, and they were giving me, you know, everything that they could think of. Nothing would release it all of that. And so what I understood, and I'll never forget, because it was 2003. And what I understood was okay, there's some other things that you have to do, there's some other pieces that you have to put into action, and my mantra was it's all about me in 2003. That was my mantra, and I found a really great therapist, so I was doing all the other stuff and so I added that layer on and that was the piece of me finally getting somebody to support me, because I was always that anchor for everybody else.

Speaker 2: 36:25

And so now here I am, and it wasn't that I didn't have friends who loved me. You know what I mean. It's not that I didn't have friends who were necessarily, wouldn't have necessarily been there for me, and yet I actually had people tell me you're the strongest person I know. I don't know how to help somebody as strong as you, and what I had to learn how to do was ask for the help that I need, to articulate the help that I need. So, like I said, the morning process for me was through the marriage, you know, through it ending, and you know.

Speaker 2: 37:02

And at the time I finally decided oh, you know what it's been so long, I'll move into my own room, we'll live parallel lives, it's cool, whatever. And you know. Finally, you know and it's so funny because my therapist never told me she was one of those kind of let's explore and let you come to it, and the only time she ever said something back was like she said you know, that's not normal, right. And so when I finally was like okay, how about? What would a life look like? It's just me?

Speaker 2: 37:40

What would a life look like when I don't have to be strong or I don't have to fix it or I don't have to Endure it? What would a life look like when I could just be tired. You know that I could just be present with the hurt, that I could be present with the pain, like what does that look like? And so that was a big, big part of the journey. So no, it doesn't. It doesn't happen overnight, it's not like again. Just like you don't wake up one day and say, you know, I'm gonna blow up my life. You also don't wake up one day and say, okay, I'm healed, I'm over it, everything's fine, I'm good, fine, you don't get to do that.

Speaker 1: 38:25

So what does it look like?

Speaker 2: 38:29

It looks like Moving to Savannah, georgia, on Just being led here, on having never been here, moving across the country, like you know, after I had gone through sheltering in place, taking care of my adult Some of special needs with no support and no, no contact from his father and Me saying, well, you know what, I don't have to be here. You know, like I stayed in the state, I stayed in California because my son services were there and all of that. And then COVID shut all of that down and so it looked like when else would I want to live? And Savannah just rose up in my spirit again, like I'd never been here, and so I was like, okay, and then some things happened that kind of opened up an opportunity to move, and so I came down here for a weekend and I was like, yeah, this feels right, this feels right. And I came back and I got online and I found you know, I found a home that I really, really wanted and Felt like it was mine, and then it went off the market and I was like okay, and then it came back on the market and Then the guy was like, why, I'm not sure. And I was like you know what you make up your mind and hit me back. And then it was like you know what it's yours, come get it, you know. And so I got on a plane and moved into a house site unseen, because I knew that it was. It was for me. So that's what it looks like.

Speaker 2: 40:08

It looks like it looks like trust, it looks like being divinely led, it looks like Knowing that all is well and it's not. That stuff, again, is not crazy. There was some crazy stuff that I went through just through the process, and yet it was like All things are working out for my good. Things are always working out for me with ease and grace. You know I am divinely led and protected. You know all of those mantras are not words. They are Like when you like people say the word affirmation and don't understand what it means. It means that I affirm and I agree With every part of my being that what comes out of my mouth is the truth. So, no matter what it looks like, what I am speaking over my life and into my life is the truth and I stand by that affirmation Until it shows itself to be true. That's what it looks like.

Speaker 1: 41:19

I love that there's so many people that question their guidance and for you to Share that. The way that you did and just know with every part of you that this was for you is Profound, because I feel that a lot of people they ignore that part of themselves, they ignore that guidance, they just think of it as a coincidence or, you know, they push it down. They don't want to acknowledge it. But I feel that the more you embrace it, the more that you surround yourself in it and really take it in, the greater the deeper, the more trusting it becomes, because it's there for you and everybody has access to it.

Speaker 2: 42:12

Yes, yes, I Somebody was. I was just listening to somebody. Oh god, I can't remember who it was and what he said was you are a mystic at your core and because for some people are like, oh, that's too woo, woo or that's too whatever, and it's like no, it's really what we are Like, I said it's really simple. When you get down to it. It's simple to say I Changed my mind. It's simple to say I know I'm supposed to do that. You know what I mean.

Speaker 2: 42:47

It's the other stuff that we have that has been taught out of us. That has been like, again, you can't do that, people don't do that. How are you gonna? You know, and it's like, if you just have, like the scripture says, if you have a child, like faith, if you're the faith of a child and like and I know we all didn't have the greatest Childhoods, I get that and yet again, there's a part of the purity of us then that knowing that, knowing that it's like I Know that I know that the me that I am supposed to be is in here and no matter what all this other stuff is happening outside of me, whatever's coming against me, you know, if we can tap into, like some people call it, that still small voice, some people people call it spirit, some people call it intuition, some people call it guidance. Whatever you call that, the knowing that that is the core of who we are. That is the truth, more than the core. That is the truth of who we are.

Speaker 2: 44:02

And and when we get back to that simplicity of Knowing ourselves like that, like I know, my favorite color is purple. It's not deep, you know, the heavens didn't part. That part inside of me knows that purple is my favorite color. Unicorns are my spirit.

Speaker 2: 44:28

You know, like you asked me earlier, I feel I have compassion for the underdog. Like that is just. There's no like great Deep, whatever. That is just how I'm wired. And so when we just tap into how we were wired and coming back to that's that statement I made earlier that we were created by a divine creator to be creative when we just start listening to what we're supposed to create you know, some of us are supposed to create music and some of us are supposed to create peace and some of us are supposed to create love and Some of us are supposed to create Accounting programs to balance your checkbook All of that is a profound gifting. It's how we're wired, it's who we are, and when we don't try to conform to what we're supposed supposed I'm doing the air quotes, supposed to be and we just move into who we are, it becomes really simple.

Speaker 1: 45:38

The whole who we are has been slanted through generations because of this societal narrative of being something we're not. We've lost our ability to find our way in some aspect because we've had a lot of programming, we've had a lot of Messaging, whether it's from our parents or the television, or, you know, politics, all kinds of things. So I feel that this work that you drew, that you're doing as a dream doula, is it is really important work, especially in today's world, because it does offer the opportunity to reconnect the person with their soul, authentic self and Get them back on track, because I feel like we have gotten off track. We definitely have gotten off track and I don't feel that people necessarily have had awareness About that until 2020, when everyone was forced to stop and they couldn't run away to their jobs, they couldn't run away into their vices because everybody was forced to stop and they didn't know what to do with those dark spaces in themselves or they didn't know how to handle some of the stuff that was bubbling up internally. So this time is so precious and so necessary, so that I love that you're doing this beautiful work of getting people back to their connectedness, of their true, authentic soul work and, just like you as a little girl.

Speaker 1: 47:34

This is what you were doing and now, here you are, all these years later, able to share this beautiful gift with the people that you're working with, and it's just really. It's just such a beautiful testament of how life works for us. You had these experiences, but they were all working towards something and it has been working towards this and has worked for you. And amazing, it's just amazing, and I just remind the audience, when you're in a moment and you're thinking it can't get worse, and those are the moments where you embrace the opportunity. Yeah, it could feel really ugly in that moment, but there's so much opportunity in those moments. Sometimes those are the most beautiful moments because they flower into something that you would never expect.

Speaker 2: 48:39

Yeah, absolutely. I think of all the metaphors Cause again, because I'm an artist and I've always enjoyed reading and mythology and all of those things, like the saying that you get beauty for your ashes or that the Phoenix rises from the ashes. So there's always been a journey and the cycles that keep coming, they keep repeating themselves and like, yeah, for us we're living in a time that we have seen and experienced things we never thought that we would. You know, I'm grateful my mom is still living and she's in her 80s and so she is seen, like, obviously I've seen a lot, and yet she's seen more than I have. And so the things that no one thought we would ever see or experience. And then, like you said, then 2020 comes and there's always a reset. You know, nature, nature abhors a vacuum, so there's always going to be a reset. So this particular reset was like whoa, you know? And so it has shaken a lot of people to their core.

Speaker 2: 49:55

There is definitely a what I call a cosmic grief, like some people don't even know why they're angry, like they're like just like, oh my God, what happened, or why do I feel this way, or whatever. And so, again, like I said, that those, the resistance and all of those things. And again, a lot of it is people are just grieving and they don't even know what they're grieving. That's the thing about it. They're like I know I'm. It's like when a little kid starts crying, right, it's like why are you sad? I don't know. Yeah, they're crying and you're trying to figure out why. And we have adults that don't know why they're sad, they don't know why they're angry, they don't know why they're afraid or hopeless or whatever it is. And if you just take a moment and get still and get quiet and listen, just listen, you know, and to your point, we got television talking at us and internet and text and everything. And yet if we could turn all of that off and take that moment to listen, because there's such a piece and I don't know the right word, there's a piece in the stillness is profound, that's how I'll say it. It's so profound.

Speaker 2: 51:32

And yet people are afraid of that because it's like, oh, what's gonna come up if I get quiet? You know, like what are the voices inside going to start telling me? And so it's like let me just stay busy and let me keep going. And yet it just really is that simple and it's like don't be afraid of who you are. Do not be afraid of who you are.

Speaker 2: 52:00

And I think that that's one of the things and I think that's probably one of my greatest gifts is, I've always been able to be unapologetically me, like unapologetically me and like I would love and I don't mean this in a and see, even that I usually don't even qualify it and yet for the listener, I want the listener to know that it is okay to know how great you are. It's okay to say I am frigging amazing, I am so good at XYZ, and not like well, I don't want to sound like I'm, no, I want you to embrace your gift and your greatness, because when you can come clear on who you are and clear on what your gift is, that's when the friction kind of goes away, cause you're not like will they judge me or do I have to judge them? It's just like no, I'm bringing my part to the party. Here comes my part to the party who wants to play. And when we come together like that, loving who we are, securing who we are, let's play.

Speaker 1: 53:11

Yeah, I love that analogy Cause it just creates this visual of celebrating life, really just celebrating life, and life is a beautiful thing. It really is more beautiful the more we go into our journey with full awareness of our true self, because we can really feel the joy, we can feel the peace, we can be fully surrendered. No, we're protected and we're safe and it's okay to be a thousand and 10% who we are and it's okay really. And I do feel these times that we're in right now it is a battle for our soul. It is a battle because we have so many forces that are coming at us, but if we can be in awareness and we can see the peace that we are bringing like you're saying, you know all the gifts that we have that we can bring and just resonate on that and bring them forward in such a profound way and build off of them, just like you're doing with your clients it just elevates that person into a whole nother soul, ascension, awareness, right, and that's part of the gift of growing and being more than, but also being, just really being.

Speaker 1: 54:46

This conversation has been really incredible and, as I shared with you before we started, I never know where they're gonna go and I'm always intrigued with the twists and turns and where we end up and I think it's really amazing and I really wish so much love and peace and joy and healing for you in this new chapter, in this new place that you're residing in and really healing your body in such a profound way that all that autoimmune disease goes away and there's no longer a piece of you because that piece of you is healed. And I just really see that for you and see so much joy and so much peace for you and love. So I'm so blessed to have you on the show and I just can't thank you enough. For us it's been really incredible.

Speaker 2: 55:49

Thank you. The pleasure has been absolutely mine and the good news is, like that part, I'm healed. So, yeah, fabulous, fabulous, yeah, so yes, but thank you, thank you, thank you and thank you for having me, and let me just take just a moment, if you wanna indulge me and just allow me to honor you and celebrate you for listening to this call and for having these conversations and for moving and putting this together and asking for people to come and share their stories and creating a platform and a space that we can have these conversations and then put them out in the world. I just wanna thank you, I wanna celebrate you, I wanna acknowledge you and just, you know, say keep going, because it means something, it matters, and kudos to you for listening to your still small voice.

Speaker 1: 56:39

No, thank you so much and God bless you for that. It's really beautiful and I'm always humbled because, as much as I love doing this and as I shared, it's just really a joy just to have this experience, this human experience. And I have no idea how it trickles and ripples across, you know, the globe and around the globe, but I'm confident that everyone who's meant to hear it is listening and hears it and it's radiating through them as well. So it's just really beautiful. And I have one final question for you, and this was God given. So if I were to pick up your earth angel feather off the ground and I picked it up what would the message you have be to the world? What would your message to the world be?

Speaker 2: 57:38

Wow, Keep going, keep going Like, be present where you are in that moment and, yet again, not stuck in the story. Just keep walking through it and just keep going and keep showing up fully and authentically as yourself and you will get and become and be in the moment who you were designed and meant to be.

Speaker 1: 58:11

I can't agree more about the keep going part, because I feel that if we can keep moving through discomfort, then you're moving through healing and it's gonna be okay.

Speaker 2: 58:27

Absolutely absolutely.

Speaker 1: 58:30

Yeah, yes, thank you, thank you, thank you so appreciate everything you've offered to the audience and just being here and, like I said, so much love and peace and everything, but it just what I see is just such fullness in your life, you know, moving forward and it's just really beautiful. So I'm super excited for you and just can't thank you enough.

Speaker 2: 58:57

Thank you, it's been my pleasure.

Speaker 1: 58:59

And for my audience listening. Thank you so much for being with us today, so appreciate it Again. This is Catherine Daniels, with Retreat to Peace, reminding you to live your authentic life with peace and, as always, retreat to Peace and we'll see you next time. Argued music.