Retreat to Peace
Retreat to Peace
Resilience and Recovery: From Personal Trauma to Transformative Life Coaching
Join us on a transformative journey as we chat with Brooke Collins, a certified life coach who bravely shares her personal triumph over domestic abuse and alcoholism. Brooke's story is not one of despair, but rather a testament to human resilience - she turns her darkest hours into a beacon of hope, inspiring many to seek change. She bares all, from the moment she realized she needed to reclaim her life to her first steps into sobriety.
In a candid conversation, Brooke unveils the challenges she faced – escaping an abusive marriage, battling alcoholism, and hitting rock bottom. She offers a compelling narrative on acceptance and desperation, and how these emotions propelled her towards recovery. Her journey is proof that anyone can rise above personal trauma with the right support, and she emphasizes the importance of a strong community in this process.
But it's not all about trauma and recovery. Annie Axell shares her adventurous tale of uprooting life from Denmark to Hungary, along with her husband and five horses. Despite numerous hurdles, they turned their experiences into a thriving coaching business, helping others conquer their fears of riding or of horses in general. This is a story of courage, of never giving up and embracing the possibilities that life presents.
Let Brooke's and Annie's journey serve as a reminder that change is possible, and resilience is the key to overcome all adversities.
Please visit us at: http://retreattopeace.com to find out more about the shows you love to listen to, the upcoming retreats we have planned and your favorite merchandise to help support those in need. Also, send us your testimonial of how the show or Catherine has helped you. We would love to share your story on the air.
Thank you so much for being here with me. We know we're living in some volatile times. We know that the world is changing, so let's create a bridge as we travel through one another's countries, removing all the labels, coming together as one people, finding our home as one world. And as we do this, this is why our signature talk today about being brave, to change and how to live a life created by you is so important. And today I'd just like you to settle in so we can jump right into our podcast, as I am welcoming Brooke Collins and we're so excited to have you here today, brooke.
Speaker 2:I'm so excited to be here. Thank you.
Speaker 1:Absolutely so. Brooke is actually a certified transformational life coach, speaker and founder of the Simplicity Seekers Club, helping women break up with the busy and create the life that they want for themselves. After an abusive marriage and alcoholism that nearly killed her, she decided to quit drinking, take responsibility for her situation and take her life back. She is passionate about helping women become who they want to be and step into their purpose, and she lives in Rochester Hills, michigan in the United States, with her husband and their two daughters. Thank you so much, brooke, for being with us today.
Speaker 2:I really appreciate it.
Speaker 1:Thanks for having me. I'm excited to be here Absolutely, and I would love to hear more about this bravery that you talk about and how we can take and create this life that we all want for ourselves. So share with me a little bit how this got started for you.
Speaker 2:Okay, well, that's a long one, but no, I'll condense it, I'll give you the short version. So, as you mentioned, it was in an abusive marriage and I was struggling with alcoholism. But that really was all stemming from some childhood trauma and I had no idea that I had. Really I knew I had endured some stuff but I didn't realize that it was trauma because in my mind trauma was something horrific Like. I couldn't even see this, this my situation, for what it was.
Speaker 2:And I was grew up in Michigan in the suburbs, and I had a really idyllic childhood until I was 10 and my sister got diagnosed with a rare juvenile pediatric bone cancer and fought a very heroic battle against cancer but ended up losing and dying three years later. So that really traumatized me and it took me a long time to even be able to say that. You can see, I still struggle like trauma, you know, because there's so many lessons wrapped up in it that I learned from her. So I try not to think of it as a trauma, being traumatized, but it was. It ripped. It ripped my family apart, my family unit. It pulled me away from my mom and my sister always at the hospital. This was in like 1990 when she got diagnosed. So chemo was like a 10 day thing. They were in the hospital at the pediatric unit and my dad and I were just kind of left at home, you know, so he could get me to school and all the things that I needed to do. And so I started to feel I didn't start to feel my parents didn't make me feel unimportant, but I knew that what I was going through, like with school and the normal day to day stuff of kids that they go through, was not as important as what my sister was fighting. So I took that on myself as I'm not going to talk about this because they're dealing with my sister's life and it's not important for me to discuss which, of course, snowballs, you know, that type of thinking starts growing and evolving and after my sister died I just wanted everything to go back to normal. I wanted to pretend it was a blip and it never happened and she didn't exist and just start over.
Speaker 2:Naturally my parents, being blown apart by it, were not willing to jump on my idea of how we should fix things and that caused a lot of resentment with my mom in particular when I was younger, and feelings of not being good enough for her and I'm never going to fill the shoes of my sister and the things that she accomplished and I'm never going to be good enough. And that's where it all starts. So when you think that way about yourself and you are looking for people to validate it, you'll find the validation that you're seeking. And that's what I did consistently throughout my school days and in college. I just never felt valuable. I didn't value myself, I didn't like myself and I did a lot of eating my feelings before I started drinking and then, when I got into later high school, early college, started drinking and that was like the ticket to freedom for me. I was free of all of this stuff that I had been burying. I didn't let a feeling seep out ever and it was this whole facade, this whole show that I was putting on.
Speaker 2:And then, when I was 21, I met this guy and we had actually gone to elementary school together in middle school and he had moved away and he came back and to town one weekend and met him and it was like this off to the races, just this all-encompassing emotional feeling from the start and I shouldn't own then to run away, but I didn't. So that turned into your typical we party together a lot. That was day by day until it started to turn not his love and affection, started to turn not loving and not affectionate. And it was very manipulative in the way that it messed with my head so badly and I started believing things because looking back I see now I always believe those things. He was just validating the way that I had thought about myself and it took this moment of we had had this argument and I locked myself in the bathroom, like I did a lot of nights, and he was sitting outside the bathroom door and anyone who's gone through abuse can probably sympathize with this or they've been through this where they just don't leave the doorway and they're still talking to you and they're still saying horrible things to you and you're just sitting there locked in a room like just waiting for silence. And he made the comment of you know your parents think that the wrong kid died right, like they're disappointed that you're the one that's living. And that hit me because up until that point I had never said anything like that out loud to people, but I had felt it my whole ever since my sister had passed away. I always felt that they felt that the wrong kid was around, not by anything. They did not by anything, they said just my feelings about myself. So when you carry the weight of that around for so long and you hide it from everybody and this one person who is mean all the time and he sees it well, how does he see it? It must be true, if he can see it.
Speaker 2:So that started the real acceleration of my drinking and my alcoholism and you know a few really scary moments. We got married, we had a daughter and I stopped drinking for my daughter and that was obviously very good, being pregnant and not drinking. And you know, I was sober, I'm a nurse and everything. So it was about two years where I was not consuming alcohol, but my husband was daily and it just became this dangerous. It was dangerous. He had been diagnosed by a polar, he was unmedicated, I knew nothing about mental illness. I'm now like 25.
Speaker 2:And it was extremely terrifying to live in a space where you didn't know what you were going to come up against every single day and waiting for the shoe to drop. And I don't know if you've been in situations where you are around someone and I would say, oh, it's like saying the sky is blue. And then he would argue that it's green. And I'm crazy, because the sky is green. And then it's like who's what's happening here, you know? Like who's the one who needs the help? Maybe it is me.
Speaker 2:So I lived like that for quite a few years and there was a time when it was the night before Father's Day and my daughter was 11 months old and he we had been at his sisters and I didn't know he had been drinking, but I had had some drinks and he was driving and I said something and he just, I just felt this utter like he sat back and then there was just blood everywhere, like I didn't. He punched me so hard from the driver's seat I had no idea what even happened. I didn't see it coming at all and there was just blood everywhere. And he kept driving and was not going home, wanted me to take my shirt off and like cover my face and fix, make myself, stop bleeding. But then it got to a point where he was driving. I didn't know where we were and I started to see that this, he was maybe gonna get rid of me or really harm me.
Speaker 2:I started to get like very fearful for my my, not just my safety but my life. Like, where are we going? We're in the middle of farms and he did pull up to this farm and told me to get out of the car and then go bury my shirt, and I thought he was going to leave me there or get out with you know, I didn't know, and so I was able. I got rid of the shirt and I was able to kind of figure out where I was and get my bearings and I noticed we were not far from his mom's house and I was able to tell him, talk him into getting to his mom's house so that we could talk, but we could put Gabriella in in with her grandma so that she would be safe and we could continue. Whatever he was upset about at the time which that's the funny thing, I have, no, I don't even remember what he was upset about at the time and I was. I got, the minute I she opened the door, I think I was fight or flight and I like collapsed in the door, just so grateful to have somebody to like pull me away, and I wish I could tell you that that was the last time that I endured anything from him. But I went back for more, which most of us do after trauma, right Like I.
Speaker 2:It's this big circle cycle of self-loathing and self. I don't know that I ever hated myself, but I did not see myself, I was not worthy, I didn't think I was worthy of anything. And I'm grateful for the child that we had for my daughter, because I had parents who, even though I felt a certain way from trauma as a child, I had parents who loved me and deep down I knew that they loved me and they would do whatever it took to help me succeed in life and put everything into me. And I remember, you know, my mom always said once you have kids, it's not about you, it's about that you put your needs after your children's. That's what you know I was taught, that's what I'm teaching you. And so I'm grateful for that, because when the tables turned and it kind of went on my my then three year old that was the, my ticket to walk, you know, and I saw where it was going to go.
Speaker 2:I had this like real quick vision of what my life could look like and that was it. I said I'm done, I'm not going to tolerate this anymore, and you're certainly not. I couldn't do it for myself. I valued my daughter so much and I love her I'm going to cry like I love her so much today that I couldn't let her be hurt by someone who's supposed to love her and learn that that's okay. So it's because of her, the whole start of my journey, that I was able to be brave enough to leave, and it wasn't even for me yet, it was for her. So I'm grateful for that. And I think motherhood we do a lot of things as parents that you wouldn't even think of doing for yourself, you know, but to protect your children, you do the unthinkable. You know the mama bear comes out and I will do what it takes to like help my children survive. Basically, I think it's like in our DNA.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I think I, first of all, you know thank you for being so transparent, honest and raw. I hear all of that pain and you know how you're speaking, so you know it's not an easy thing to talk about, but I appreciate it because I think so many people in our audience can understand or may have been in a similar circumstance where they're feeling trapped or they're feeling in a prison cell of their head as far as like the thoughts that are looping around in their minds and then holding on to the traumas that they're holding on to and not being able to release them and let them go.
Speaker 1:I know as part of your bio you had talked about the alcoholism and I can only imagine how difficult that was, you know, in your journey, to have to go through that experience, but then also to be a mom living with someone who's an alcoholic and has a, you know, bipolar diagnosis and had to be beyond extremely difficult. So at what point are you feeling that you have to get off this like hamster wheel? You know where do you hit your rock bottom? Where do you start to figure this?
Speaker 2:out. So the event of the timeline of leaving my husband my then husband and getting sober is about a three year and couple months timeline. So I wish I could say that that was it, like the light turned on and I had this revelation and I, you know, pulled myself out of the darkness. But when you are, when you condition yourself to not heal and not release the trauma, like you said, like it is becomes a game of how to numb it. How do I numb this? How do I push it back down? It's coming up like a jack in the box now, but I have to keep trying to push it down further and further so that eventually, hopefully, it just disappears. Well, it doesn't work like that, obviously, and so my drinking accelerated my 30th birthday, I struggled with turning 30 and did this whole. Look where I am.
Speaker 2:I moved back in with my parents because, thank God, my parents moved me, my daughter, in, and I was looking for an apartment and I started comparing my life to my friends that I'd grown up with and they have houses and now they they're having kids and they're accelerating in their jobs and, you know, played that card for about mmm, probably six or eight months, and then, finally, the destruction was just, I was drinking so much that I wasn't. It wasn't fun. It became not fun anymore and anyone who's in recovery in your audience, I'm sure can go back to the end of their using or drinking. And it was not fun. It was my. I was numbing to sleep like I was literally drinking to pass out on my couch to not have to exist or deal with the world or life, and as long as I could get some vodka and and pass out like I was gonna be okay. And that became really a sad existence and I started to get little seedlings of you know, don't you think you deserve more? Don't you think your daughter deserves more? And I was able to finally admit one day that I just I had a problem with drinking and I told my mom and she actually got like teary-eyed and said we know, and you know, as this alcoholic, I think that I'm fooling everybody and nobody knows what's going on. And so that was.
Speaker 2:I went, started going to recovery meetings, you know, 12-step program, and that lasted a couple months and then I met up with an old friend and fell off the wagon for about two more months and then the big kaboom was over the holidays, you know, I was drinking, my husband showed back up and stole my car. There was like this whole dramatic sequence of things being shown again to me like make the right choice, because this is your, don't go back down this road. And I drank for like two days straight, three days straight, and my mom and dad were. They were at their house, my girlfriend had called me. It was 6 am on a Monday morning, that much I do know and I was talking about not wanting to live anymore. And so she, thank God, for some reason had my parents phone numbers like I don't know how they exchange numbers, but she had them and she called my mom and said I think you need to go over the Brooks apartment and I think she needs help. So my mom came over and I was so incoherent that she called 911 because I could barely, I couldn't walk, I couldn't, I was like really slurring, and so the ambulance came and took me to the hospital where, you know, I had a point three, nine, nine blood alcohol level.
Speaker 2:So, talking, sitting there, you know, like it's just another day, and that was the point for me that I realized how I had been playing with my life, my humanity like I was.
Speaker 2:I had passed out many times in that state and then I started thinking, like how many times have I been so close to death from alcohol and didn't know it?
Speaker 2:And I'm lucky that I woke up, because it wasn't any different than any other day had been preview previous to it.
Speaker 2:You know, and I think the angels or whoever was working, god, the universe, whatever was working for me at that point because my mom found the woman I had been using as a sponsor, you know, at the beginning of when I first went to meetings and contacted her, and she came to the hospital and, you know, asked me if I was willing to do what it took to get sober and just do it, shut it down and do what I was told.
Speaker 2:And you know, if I wanted a life like she had, I didn't have to drink anymore and I was given the gift of desperation. And I say it's a gift because it was because without the desperation I never would have taken the step, because the thought of not drinking was so terrifying to me and the thought of having to feel things and look at my side of the street instead of always being the victim was I mean, it was like I would have like heavy, I would lose my breath, like it was so terrifying. So I always talk about the one small step, because without taking that one small step and accepting her hand that she's, you know, holding out to me, you know I, I know for certain, I wouldn't be here.
Speaker 1:I know that for fact that's powerful as far as like being in that space.
Speaker 1:I know it's a long journey. You know that road to recovery it's a moment to moment decision, especially in those early hours, early days, and that's that is hard, that's very hard. But what's interesting is you're talking about being authentic to yourself and making a decision, about being true to yourself and valuing yourself in that moment, like literally just taking a moment to think about that. So it's interesting. With your story, you know you talk about the alcoholism, you talk about this bottom. So how do you, how do you springboard from this place and time where you're actually creating space that you're living the life of your dreams, you're living the life that you want how do I get there?
Speaker 2:oh yeah, bumpy, it's not a good, it's not as I wish. I say all the time to clients that are struggling when they're like I thought like having an awakening or like a spiritual experience would look so much like white light and better, and I'm like my awakening spiritual experience look like tornado. You know had rolled through with the hurricane at the same time. So I literally rose up like a phoenix from the ashes and was able to say, like man, I burned it all down, but boy was it? Was it necessary for me to awaken and and move into the life of my dreams? You know, it's not easy to go after what you want. People think that you just set a goal and you go for it, but sometimes the thought of what you want is is just as scary as the thought of not getting it and you get paralyzed in this spot and it looks a lot like for me getting to where I am today.
Speaker 2:There was a lot of honesty that had to happen. There was a lot of vulnerability, which I was not used to, and sharing what I'm feeling when I'm feeling it, and knowing that it's okay to have feelings and feel them. Um, and you know, it's really funny when I think back, because my mom, when I was a little girl, would always say to me it's okay that you feel that way, everybody has feelings, feelings are feelings and they're irrational, so feel it and move on. And then it's like ignore, ignore, ignore. And then, when I'm starting to deal with my feelings at 31, I reflected on that so many times Like it's okay, you know what? It's not rational that I'm mad right now, or it's not rational that I'm sad right now, but it is what it is. And if I don't let it come up, then what? You know, what is the purpose of all of this? Because the point was for me to not just get sober, but I had, for a very long time, um, felt a push, a calling, a need, a desire, um, that I couldn't ignore to help other people. And so, for my journey, it looked a lot like at the beginning, once I've got a couple months and a year of sobriety under my belt, it looked a lot like sponsoring other women in the program and showing them what was given to me and the steps and how to work them and how I, you know, was able to pull myself out of where I was. And then it started evolving from the sponsorship to maybe I should get you know, um certified in this, or go back to school and learn something about this. And you know, that's where the the evolving for me learning. I can't ever learn enough. I'm constantly studying, I'm constantly wanting to take some course or development class or something. I just I can never get enough information on it.
Speaker 2:Um, and in, having the community of Alcoholics Anonymous was pivotal for me in my journey and it's because I was able to share in a safe space. You know everything I was feeling, um and more, and it's what I have worked to create in my business, with my women's soul circles or with my membership club. And it's this you know few. I read a quote the other day before I knew we were going to be recording this and it was. You know, shame dies when stories are told in safe places, and that is what was happening.
Speaker 2:All of the shame that I had put onto myself and that I felt was peeling away because I had women around me who said I'm going to love you until you love yourself, and when you love yourself I'll let you know. You can fly free and do all of the things that you've always wanted to do confidently, and that, to me, was the real, the real deal for me, because I had always wanted to see myself go where I wanted to go, but I didn't believe I could do it and I still struggle with fear of success. I'm like my own worst enemy. You know and I explain that to anyone I work with or anyone I'm talking to I can lay to match to my life or my situation real fast and I just you know I am my own worst enemy and I get afraid of a lot of things. But in getting sober and going through the things that I needed to go through, becoming honest, vulnerable, open, and I see the vulnerability as bravery.
Speaker 2:I really, really love Brene Brown for all of her work and all of the stuff that she shares on how you know, the call to courage and bravery is being vulnerable. It's through that fearlessness and just opening up. That is where your power lies and it's taken me a very long time to understand that and now I'm addicted to helping other women find that. And when they light up, showing their real, their true selves, their authentic selves and how they feel, and you can see it first, my soul circles, you know, I'll see them look around like is that okay? You know, the people, please, are coming out right Maybe I shared too much and when they see that, everyone is like, wow, that was powerful, thank you, you know, and then they get this.
Speaker 2:It's like this immediate color around them and this aura and this wow, I just shared, like something so true that I don't I'm shared in a roomful of women that are strangers.
Speaker 2:I shared this and I feel incredible because I did it.
Speaker 2:So that is, you know, the little, the majority of how I turned it around and somewhere in there, my husband was introduced to me by my sponsor and we dated, and that was hard for me to accept love from a significant other, I would say all the time at the beginning, to stop loving me so much. I just refused to receive, allow myself to receive the good things and the love that was all around me, you know, and I'm grateful that I did receive it eventually, because we have a second daughter and a beautiful home and a marriage that I'm happy in and feel safe in, which is the most important for me and my kids have a dad who loves them to be happy and to be happy. My kids have a dad who loves them to pieces and my daughter has a sister who looks up to her and you know she doesn't call him or stepdad, and it's just. It's incredible when, when I look back, because I truly believe that had I not taken my sponsor's hand in the hospital bed Sorry, I wouldn't have any of it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's, it's incredible the journey that you've had so far, but it's such a beautiful journey at the same time, because you've you've been gifted this experience to help other people and change their lives, and in a world where we're living in a global pandemic right now, I'm sure there's people that are listening in our audience that may be struggling. Maybe they're taking in vices that they know they shouldn't be taking in, whether it's alcohol or drugs. I mean, what? What kind of message would you have for somebody who's listening to, maybe in that turmoil of struggle at this moment in time?
Speaker 2:Oh, that's a good one. You know the message for people struggling and living in turmoil with a vice any vice. You don't have to choose that anymore if you don't want to. You really are in control of your life and you may not see it right this second, but you can make the choice to not pop that pill or to not take that drink, or to not go to the fridge every night at two in the morning or whatever it may be. Not spend the money that you don't have. You can make that choice and you're worth making that choice for because in the chaos you can be the calm. You can become the calm in your own storm by just choosing you and recognizing that you're worth more than that. And it takes. It takes courage, and it takes pushing through the fear and having a little bit of bravery. But I always tell people suit up, suit up, put it on, put your suit on and be ready to fight for yourself, because I guarantee you're worth it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, absolutely. And your, your connection to community that you talked about, I feel, is so impactful as well, just having a support system. I think sometimes people lose their way because they lose their support system. Maybe people are judging or maybe people have, you know, decided to take a different path, so there's connections that are lost. So that connection to community, even a global pandemic, I mean, what's your recommendation for that?
Speaker 2:I say definitely find community. Certainly anyone that's listening that resonates with my story can reach out to me. But I have found this pandemic to be incredibly profound in my life in two areas. One, I'm no longer handling or dealing with the busy that I was dealing with pre COVID-19 because that isn't normal, and being forced to shut down showed me that it wasn't normal and I was going to burn out somewhere down the line. And second, the power and the beauty of technology. We can connect with people in a virtual form and feel so, heard and seen by.
Speaker 2:I've done it with strangers in Zoom meetings and I've gone to you know a meetings where in New Zealand I've gone to. You know I've had virtual soul circles with. I had people from someone from London and somebody from South America and you know it's the power of technology and allowing it to flow in the right way in your life and using it as a tool to connect with people. I think it's so much easier for people to open up with strangers than it is with the people that they're closest to and that's always like the first step. So, without a doubt that Facebook has tons of groups, instagram has people you know.
Speaker 2:You just search keywords and find your people and jump in, because I'm taking those steps myself in virtual platforms and finding people to help me with whatever I'm going through at the time, because it's necessary and we're not sure how long this is going to last. And is this the new normal? There's so many fear driven questions with everything that's happening right now. So to be able to plug in and have a group that you know what if you do get shut down again for a week or two weeks or a month? You've got them at your fingertips. You just have to log on to your computer. I mean, that's beautiful.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's incredible. Yeah, so I mean, I love, I love this idea of you. Know how you've created your, your new world, your new life, with this happiness, and it's all centered around being your authentic self and just living in that higher consciousness like you had talked about. You know all those little messages that people get that they ignore. They're so, so powerful and so important. So I think sometimes you know, when you tune into that, it can cause you to take a different road, and that's exactly what you did, which is just beautiful, brooke. So I have a question for you If I were to pick up your Earth Angel feather off of the ground, what would your message to the world be?
Speaker 2:My message would be that one simple act of bravery takes you where you want to go. It's just one small step.
Speaker 1:That's beautiful. Your story is so powerful and I'm just so filled with gratitude that you were so brave and courageous to share it with us today. So thank you so much for doing that. I have to believe there's not a dry eye listening to this podcast, because it's so moving. I know it moved me and I just know that there's so many people that can resonate with your message. I know we didn't talk too much around being a woman in a domestic abusive relationship, but there's also support for them as well. I just want to acknowledge that they should also reach out to their community and get that support if they need to. But if anyone in the audience would like to connect with Brooke, you can reach her on Instagram on Innovative Coach Brooke and she does have an E at the end of Brooke and you're also able to find her at lifecoachbrokegmailcom as well. So, brooke, thank you so much for being with us today. I just really appreciate it.
Speaker 2:No, thank you so much for having me. It's an incredible mission that you're on and I'm honored Honestly, I'm honored to be a part of it. You're in the world, it's amazing things.
Speaker 1:It is. It's beautiful. So that's all we have time for today. This is Catherine Daniels, reminding you to live your authentic life with peace and retreats in peace. We'll see you next time.
Speaker 2:MUSIC PLAYING.
Speaker 1:Thank you so much for being here with me. We know we live in some volatile times and we know that the world is changing, so let's create a bridge as we travel through one another's countries, removing all the labels, coming together as one people, finding our home in one world. And as we do this, this is why our signature talk about how my horse experience changed my life through COVID is so important. So let's settle in and jump right in. Today. I am very excited to welcome my guest.
Speaker 1:Her name is Annie Excell. Annie actually was born in 1957 and she started in writing school when she was only nine years old. When she was 15 she got her first pony and when she was 18 she got her first big horse. And the rest of her life she's only spent 14 days without horses. She's an educated saddle maker and was working with that for many years, but also has renovated horse carriages. She bought her first stallion in 1978. She also had four stallions approved and have five more that she's been breeding over the years. She also bred palominos and she still does that.
Speaker 1:In 1999 she started as a professional horse dealer where she imported and exported horses all over Europe, but she did stop that some years ago. She has been riding all these years, except for a couple of years when she had her children, and she has completed in dressage, jumping, military and driving, but also has tried western classic dressage, hunting and other games, and her goal is to have fun with the horse. She's completed a lot of horses as exterior judge, dressage judge, color judge that's a mouthful and has also competed several self development courses and coaching courses and her dream is to use her knowledge to help people in relation to their horse and to help them choose the right horse for when they are buying a horse. So that's a wonderful, wonderful resume you have there, annie. Thank you so much for being a guest today and thank you for just sharing everything you have about your horse experience. I really appreciate that.
Speaker 3:I'm glad to be here.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so where are you right now? Where do you live?
Speaker 3:I live in Hungary since one and a half year. We moved here, my husband and I. We are born in Denmark but we have lived most of our adult life in Sweden. But one and a half year ago we decided that now we wanted something else. We are like that, both my husband and I. We like to do new things. So we sold our farm. We had a big farm in Sweden and thought we had bought a house in Hungary and it turned out that one of the owners he wouldn't sell anyway. So we have to find another place, and that was a bit messy. We had a little house, since I have been dealing horses in all Europe, so I had bought a little summer house here in Hungary. So we lived there for a while until we found this place. And this is a place where there are a lot of old buildings and our dream was to renovate them and make a good place here for people to come maybe tourists or apartments or something like that and have an experience in Hungary with horses.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Now, why did you choose Hungary? What was it about Hungary that was so special?
Speaker 3:We looked at all Europe and we looked at Spain and Portugal and all these countries where many Europeans moved to because they have a lot of sun and beaches. But we think that it's very dry in this country and Hungary is green. Here is green trees, and it's not that dry here and I wanted my horses to come with me and I wanted grass for my horses and I also love the forest myself.
Speaker 1:I love that. I love that. So today, in 2020, what does your life look like with everything going on in the world?
Speaker 3:Yeah, we, as I said, we had a bad experience when we first moved here because we couldn't move into the house that we thought we had bought. And I had five horses with me. And when we found this place we thought this is good, but we didn't have that much money because we would have to renovate this place. So we agreed to invest the money to get a little more so we could do what we wanted to, but we ended up losing everything. So we lived in our little little house and I had my five horses on the riding school and we had paid a little on this place. So we talked with the owner and now we rent it instead. So we lived here, but when we had thought that we would earn our money to get tourists here. But we couldn't renovate it because of the money.
Speaker 3:So my husband had to go to Sweden again to get a job, because the Hungarian language is very, very difficult, so he's driving an excavator. So he said I cannot work in Hungary, I had to work in Sweden. So he went to Sweden and he had been here just over Christmas. He went in October, then he was here for Christmas and then he went back again. So I have been here seven months all alone.
Speaker 1:Oh, my goodness, that's a long time and I know for a lot of people it's difficult to be isolated from their family, from their friends. So what are you doing when you miss your husband and you miss your family?
Speaker 3:Well, first of all, I use Zoom a lot. I think it's very good and I'm so happy that I have my phone as well. We can always call each other and nowadays you can see each other as well. So I think I made it quite well. And of course, I have made some friends here in Hungary as well. So I have talked to people.
Speaker 3:I have not been totally alone, but of course I miss my two boys. They also live in Sweden. When we think we should live here, we thought that we could go to Sweden back and forward, but the money is not there for that yet. So I thought I have to do something. And what should I do?
Speaker 3:Some here in the back of my head, I have always thought that I have so much experience with horses over 50 years with horses so something I have done right, so maybe I could teach that to other people. And I started to think about how can I manage that. And I have also done a little work with MLM. Before I sold vitamins. And there I started to meet all these coaches, the big ones, Tony Robbins and all of them. So I had this in my head that there is something better I can do. So I start to take these courses and now I have started a coaching business where I help people that are afraid. If they have fallen off the horses, or if they have children and have not ridden for a while, then I help them and coach them so they are not afraid any longer.
Speaker 1:Wow, that is really incredible that you are able to take your talent and turn it into a business like that, and I think your message is so impactful in this time around the world because so many people have lost jobs and they are trying to figure out what to do next and for some people that is a very scary thing going from something to creating a business where they may have been working in a business. So I love that.
Speaker 1:Your horse experience has just completely changed your life and how you are using that to build a future. So you are passionate around the horses. You can feel it as you speak and just hearing your resume of how much you have worked with horses throughout your life I mean, they are beautiful creatures and how they are to begin with, but I think it is really, really amazing that you are able to do that. So you are coaching people with the horses. What is your bigger plan with your coaching business? Is that something that, after things start to open up again, will you invite people to come to you to work with the horses, or how does that look?
Speaker 3:Well, I have got used to Zoom and I think it is a great thing to do because you can have customers all over the world, and I have also created a Facebook group for these people and I make a webinar every Sunday and invite other horse people and the good thing there is that there is going to be a connection and when they have been on a webinar, they also said yeah, maybe we can work together. So my big plans are that take other people and that is a huge market with horses, saddles and yoga and horseshoes and everything. So all of these people who are working with horses could go together and make something very good, because in the past you have always had to work with the horse. As you said, Come with the horse and I will be there and I will show you. But a lot of these people have started to use cameras when people ride and they sit at home and look at them and help them from the home. I think that is a fantastic thing.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and to be able to do it around the world like that is incredible, because you can be in Hungary, I can be in the United States and you can be showing me exactly what to do with my horse, and that is really incredible. So how does your audience find you on Facebook? Is it just any Excel? How do they find you?
Speaker 3:Yes, I have a homepage, annaaxelcom, and I have this Facebook group, inspiration Group for Riders its name, but it is only in Swedish here in the beginning, but I am working on making it international, so my homepage is in English.
Speaker 1:Okay, yeah, I love that. So I have one last question for you. If I were to find your earth angel feather on the ground, what would your message to the world be?
Speaker 3:I would say never give up. Think positive, because if you are curious, you don't have to give up. There are so many opportunities in the world and, as you said, it is terrible with people who are unemployed and they don't know how to get on with their life. But just be open and see, because there are really many opportunities.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and that is a great message for the world to hear right now. I think it is the most key message for everyone. It is just never give up. No matter what is happening, just don't give up. So thank you so much for joining us today, Really appreciate it. It has been such a nice light conversation and I love your passion around the horses. I think that is so beautiful and just to share it with the world is beautiful.
Speaker 1:So, that is all we have time for today. This is Catherine Daniels, reminding you to live your authentic life and peace and, as always, retreat to peace. We will see you next time.